I got nothin’ this week. It has been uneventful and pretty lame to this point. So I asked a friend what I should write about and he responds with “fake boobies and ass implants”. Well, the boobies didn’t interest me..but ass implants..now that’s something I could dig my teeth into. Let us start with the basics. The procedure is referred to as Gluteal Augmentation or, Buttocks Magnification but for the sake of this audience I will refer to them as Ass Implants… sounds cooler and I would like to see how many times I can use “ass” in less than 500 words.
Many of you are probably wondering “who would get an ass implant?” Well, some people are flat out lazy and in being so lazy never do the work necessary to properly shape and build the ass. Others are not so fortunate… some have serious ass deformities causing depression and self esteem issues. These people need their ass implants to make them complete and they get the green light from me to have this horrific procedure done. The surgery, if you call it that, is a fairly simple procedure. It involves cutting 3 in incisions at the midline and digging out a space to slide the meaty goods into the ass region. The patient is then stitched up and sent on their way to cope with a painful recovery period. Some of the side effects most commonly experienced are bacterial infections, nerve and muscle damage, bleeding, slippage and asymmetry. So you’re gonna pay thousands of dollars for an ass that may be even more fucked than the one your momma gave you! Sweet… I hope this was informative and that you all got something out of it.
On to the music! I’m going off the grid this week and going with the new Gnarls Barkley track “Run”. I’m not sure about it yet but I figured you all can listen to it and give me your opinions..you know so I can form my own. Who knows it may not even be on the album but whatever right?
CLICK TO HEAR
Next batter up? Again I dip into the way back machine for this one… Anotha Level was one of those west coast kid groups around the time Pharcyde and the Wascals came along. What’s that Cha Say was the only song I remember from the album but in rediscovering it I will listen to it in it’s entirety and report my findings. Could be one of those gems like the first Yaggfu Front record or Ya’ll So Stupids “Van Full of Pakistanis”
CLICK TO HERE
Ok..have fun, be safe and shit.
Remember when Cee-Lo was a rapper? Me neither. Anyway, that new Gnarls (I just call them by one name because it’s more efficient–I don’t have a moment to spare!) is alright. It’s no “Crazy”….is what all the kids will say. And maybe they’ll be on to something. I’m not the best judge, since I was really only checking for two tracks off the first album. But I appreciate their effort.
By the way, anyone out there who likes pre-singer Cee-Lo should cop the Goodie Mob’s “Soul Food” LP, which is, even today, still pretty next level. Organized Noize productions could really do no wrong on the boards back then. The whole album is like a musical bridge between the first two Outkast albums, but with more, uh, eclectic rapping. Cee-Lo, however, always had gems, and the rest of the fellas provide nothing if not an interesting contrast (as well as a few heaters of their own). Check it if you haven’t already…
And finally, I think the name of that Y’all So Stupid album was “Van Full Of Pakistan”, although your version, “Van Full Of Pakistanis”, is certainly more relevant to the current state of global affairs. Homeland Security should adopt it as their racial-profiling theme song. That’d be terrific.
With all this talk of Yaggfu Front and Anotha level, I’m half expecting your next post to be about, like, Atban Clan. I can’t wait…
Left by Grip Grand on January 30th, 2008